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Crap my kid Photoshopped for me: Only Bill could make Pete look like ...

Crap my kid Photoshopped for me: Only Bill could make Pete look like ...

Pete Carroll is no angel. But the head coach of the Patriots makes him look like one.

Radio Row: Say goodbye to the Press Box

Radio Row: Say goodbye to the Press Box

"The success of the Press Box show earned Peter Burns national attention and that attention ultimately led to his being discovered by ESPN and eventually hired to anchor the new...

OK, Peyton. One more year and that's it, okay?

OK, Peyton. One more year and that's it, okay?

"Pretty much everything Peyton Manning is yet to do can be done in 2015 - including winning a Super Bowl in a Broncos uniform. But after that he's got to...

It's time for the Broncos to stop walking on Manning's eggshells.

It's time for the Broncos to stop walking on Manning's eggshells.

"So long as number 18 is suiting up for the Denver Broncos the Denver Broncos will be built around Peyton Manning. The offense will be designed in his image and...

The Broncos should stick with plan "A" if only for one more year

The Broncos should stick with plan "A" if only for one more year

"Peyton Manning and John Fox are a package. It would be senseless for the Broncos to fire Fox and hire a replacement for Manning's "one last run" at the playoffs....

Radio Row: Another shoe drops in the rapidly changing sports radio scene. How much more is to come?

Radio Row: Another shoe drops in the rapidly changing sports radio scene. How much more is to come?

"It is possible, however, that Front Range Sports, now flush with the $5.75M it received from Colorado Public Radio for the 102.3 signal, could make a play to purchase the...

Godspeed, Adrian Dater. Godspeed.

Godspeed, Adrian Dater. Godspeed.

"Well, the communications must have been real. She was, if her Twitter account was to be believed, quite upset with Dater for his actions and she launched a personal campaign...

Is “Super Creepy” Adrian Dater posing more problems for the Post?

Is “Super Creepy” Adrian Dater posing more problems for the Post?

"Deadspin has once again become interested in Dater’s exploits on Twitter. This time the site was contacted by a female hockey fan who provided screen grabs of some rather creepy...

Pro leagues / teams are making deals with the Devil in daily fantasy sports

Pro leagues / teams are making deals with the Devil in daily fantasy sports

"The industry has cleverly slipped into the loopholes left in the gaming act and in doing so has essentially replaced online poker as the most popular form of internet gambling." CLICK...

A stunning Broncos loss has made us normal people again

A stunning Broncos loss has made us normal people again

"Better now than later, I say. Better for the fans. Better for the team. Not only do the Broncos now have a better perspective on how they might be beaten...

Radio Row: Survey says solo Sandy, lop off Lundy at the Fan

Radio Row: Survey says solo Sandy, lop off Lundy at the Fan

"The newest changes in Denver Sports talk radio are coming to 104.3 the Fan and would seem to have been precipitated by the results of a survey the station...

The Broncos' slow starts are nothing to dismiss

The Broncos' slow starts are nothing to dismiss

In fact, this wasn’t the first time one might’ve watched the beginning of a Broncos game and wondered what the hell is wrong with Manning? click the read more link...

The other half of Broncos Country

The other half of Broncos Country

"...ultimately, what we saw at Gillette Stadium was a team that still isn’t going anywhere if Manning isn’t playing at an elite level." click the read more link below ...

Champ must retire a Bronco

Champ must retire a Bronco

We're not normally the pomp and circumstance types around here but on this issue we agree - Champ Bailey, who announced his retirement from the NFL today despite "interest from...

Into the Fogg: Should Josh McDaniels get credit for the current Broncos success?

Into the Fogg: Should Josh McDaniels get credit for the current Broncos success?

"McDaniels, for all his glaring faults, realized that Cutler would never amount to the quarterback we all expected him to be when Denver moved up to draft him in the...

Mark Rycroft can actually make you a smarter hockey fan

Mark Rycroft can actually make you a smarter hockey fan

"Kudos to the Colorado Avalanche. In a world where more and more professional teams are turning to their broadcast crew to further their own public relations department’s agenda, it’s fantastic...

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Friday, 08 February 2013 14:42

Monster Jam: loud, brash, badass and white trash

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"Any sense that Monster Jam is an actual competition is completely contrived. It’s nothing more than an exhibition of awesomeness and raw badassism aimed at the mouth breather in all of us."

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I have my Monster Jam tickets. Do you?

If you haven’t headed to Pepsi Center for this yearly celebration of conspicuous consumption you’re missing out on what it means to be a real American. Monster Trucks are the pro wrestlers of the automotive world, juiced on 2,000 alcohol guzzling horsepower. Their tires are as tall as a man and their suspension travel is measured in feet, not inches.

They’re as useless an invention as man has ever conceived, capable of crushing automobiles, leaping into the air, and attaining speeds in excess of 100 miles per hour, but unable to make a trip to Home Depot. They have only one purpose, to make massive amounts of noise and to entertain half-witted Wal-Mart shoppers like me. Monster Trucks have names like Grave Digger, King Krunch, Iron Warrior, Iron Outlaw, Devastator and Aftershock. The guys and gals who drive the trucks are basically anonymous – it’s the rigs themselves who are the stars of the show.

Any sense that Monster Jam is an actual competition is completely contrived. It’s nothing more than an exhibition of awesomeness and raw badassism aimed at the mouth breather in all of us. Check your intelligence at the door. It is a spectacle best enjoyed with jaw slacked and drool running down your chin.

The people-watching is incredible. Monster Jam crowds looks like redneck family reunions. You’ll see people wearing monster truck fan gear, NASCAR jackets, Dale Earnhardt #8 tattoos, heavy metal tour shirts, blue jeans, more blue jeans and, of course, cowboy boots.

February is the slowest month for sports. Football is over, the NBA playoffs are a long way off, hockey has just gotten under way and baseball is still months away. What better time to load up the kids and take them down to the Can for some noise and destruction?

Last modified on Friday, 08 February 2013 14:48
Colin Daniels

Colin is the emcee of the South Stands Denver Fancast and maintains our Twitter and Facebook accounts.

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