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Radio Row: Denver fans clamor for Clough

Radio Row: Denver fans clamor for Clough

"Now that Broncos’ season is in full swing there is a appreciable chasm in Denver sports talk radio. " Read More ...

How not to get bitten by daily fantasy sports

How not to get bitten by daily fantasy sports

"First of all, realize that the inevitable 100% deposit bonus you'll be taking advantage of is the equivalent of that first line of coke you sniffed at the kegger. It’s...

Denver Does Dallas: the great “illness” mystery of pre-season week four

Denver Does Dallas: the great “illness” mystery of pre-season week four

"This synopsis of what I think might have happened is completely bereft of established fact and is no way intended to be seen as a news story. It’s entirely speculative." Read...

Here’s Your Broncos / Colts Tweetrospective™, the entire game retold in Tweets

Here’s Your Broncos / Colts Tweetrospective™, the entire game retold in Tweets

Football season is finally here and the Broncos’ first game has come and gone. It was a doozy - especially in the first half - and, as always, it was...

If the Broncos win the Super Bowl I will drink my pee.

If the Broncos win the Super Bowl I will drink my pee.

"I'll drink eight ounces. That's all. The secretion will be collected in the men's room of whatever facility I happen to be at, under moderate supervision, into a rocks glass...

High expectations mean spoiled fans in Broncos Country

High expectations mean spoiled fans in Broncos Country

"Unlike in the Elway years we failed to watch the Broncos with wide-eyed amazement. Instead we anticipated victories and felt vindicated when they came. That's why the loss in the...

Radio Row INTERVIEW: Peter Burns scored his dream gig but the Press Box will remain in good hands

Radio Row INTERVIEW: Peter Burns scored his dream gig but the Press Box will remain in good hands

"The Press Box is my baby." Burns told me. "I am not looking forward to leaving it but I know it's in good hands." Read More ...

Dusty Saunders takes Drew Soicher to task at long last

Dusty Saunders takes Drew Soicher to task at long last

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The de-Masaiing of the Nuggets has begun

The de-Masaiing of the Nuggets has begun

When Masai Ujiri remained the GM of your Denver Nuggets he was held in very high regard as one of the NBA's finest wheeler-dealers. In his absence, though, some of...

Change nothing but change the name Redskins

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"Once Daniel Snyder capitulates the matter will be swept beneath the rug within a week and our attention will be drawn elsewhere. That's the way these things work." Read more ...

Will we look back more fondly on the Tebow season than on the Manning era?

Will we look back more fondly on the Tebow season than on the Manning era?

If Peyton Manning never wins a Super Bowl with the Broncos it's quite possible that decades from now fans will look back with greater fondness on the 2011 season than...

Better grilling NOW with Mangrate, the grill enhancement system. Use promo code: Denver for a $10 discount

Better grilling NOW with Mangrate, the grill enhancement system. Use promo code: Denver for a $10 discount

We at South Stands have been using Mangrate (http://www.mangrate.com/) for years. What's Mangrate? It's the 100% made in America grill enhancement system consisting of solid cast iron grill grates just like...

Dear John: a face-painting fanatical Broncos fan confronts Reidy's disgust

Dear John: a face-painting fanatical Broncos fan confronts Reidy's disgust

The host of the South Stands Denver Fancast, our own John Reidy (@johnreidydenver), has been vocal in his digust for the Broncos since their disasterous performance in the Super Bowl....

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Saturday, 01 December 2012 14:24

Seven Things That Suck About ... Tampa Bay

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Welcome to our brand new feature - Seven Things That Suck about ...

Denver Sports fans have got it made. We're lucky to live in Colorado. Win or lose, there's no place better. That's why it's easy to find Seven Things That Suck about just about every other place. Why seven? It's our lucky number. Elway's number.

Once a week we will elevate our already mile-high civic pride by picking on some other city.

This week’s victim is Tampa Bay, ”Cigar City”, “the Big Guava”, the Lightening Capital of the World.

 

yankee

Everyone’s a Yankee fan

Tampa has its own damn baseball team. It’s called the “’Rays”, yet the residents there are more loyal to the New York Yankees who train there in the springtime. The Yankees’ practice facility, Steinbrenner Field, draws impressive crowds of loyal fans. The ‘Rays … not so much.

  pelicanshit

There’s pelican shit everywhere

Pelicans are kind of neat, especially if you weren’t raised around them. They’re all over the place in the Tampa area, though. And they shit a lot.

filthy 

It’s a filthy, filthy place

People in Tampa are really bad at picking up after themselves. The trash problem isn’t so bad in the more touristy areas, but if you wander off the beaten path and into some of the neighborhoods, you will find fast food wrappers, empty plastic bottles and cigarette butts lining the streets. It’s gross, you guys.

 callcenter2

Call Centers

Every city has its industries. In Tampa, the call center business is booming. There are hundreds of these enormous rooms full of account reps, customer service hacks and telemarketers. When you want to reach through the phone and strangle the idiot on the other end, there’s a good chance that idiot is in Tampa.

rnc-lightning 

Humidity

Tampa is sticky and humid as all hell, and it’s unrelenting pretty much year round. Add that to the fact that the place smells bad and you have yourself in a disgusting sauna of a city.

 cuban

Cubans

Fewer Cubans are defecting to Miami and more are heading for Tampa. In certain parts of the city the percentage of residents who emigrated from the tiny island country is upwards of 20%. They’re aliens, so they have a hard time finding work and often live in tenement structures.

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Miami envy

Tampa has all the disadvantages Miami has, but it lacks the glamour, the culture, the celebs and the music scene. It’s basically Miami’s ugly sister and the people who live there know it, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last modified on Saturday, 01 December 2012 14:53
Colin Daniels

Colin is the emcee of the South Stands Denver Fancast and maintains our Twitter and Facebook accounts.

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