I sincerely hope the Detroit Tigers win the World Series. Not for the team and certainly not for the city of Detroit. As a Denver sports fan we've been conditioned to hate the Detroit Red Wings as they've spoiled things all Motor City. I’ll always love the music from Detroit, but its sports teams –especially the Red Wings - can piss right off. No, I want the Tigers to win because I want to see the reaction of Twitter sensation and Michigan native, @dadboner.
@dadboner is the brilliant twitter feed chronicling the exploits of a lout named Karl Welzein: a Homer Simpson come to life, sipping cold ones and listening to Seger like a mid-western renaissance man without any of the class, money or good looks.
@dadboner is a big Tigers fans and as the team has made its way through the playoffs, @dadboner has made his way through many bottles of beer and celebratory hangovers for our reading pleasure. So if the Tigers win the World Series, the team's first since 1984, @dadboner may just tweet some of the greatest material since the social media service was invented. Or die from consumption. Either or.
And that kind of emotion and dedication to a baseball team made me realize what we are missing in Denver: good baseball to get emotional about. We've had plenty of emotions this year as the Rockies posted the worst record in club history, but those were mainly acerbic and not reflected by Toyota Talk. We’ve missed out on the elation other city’s fans have felt because the team has teased us with greatness, but painfully failed to deliver.
I won’t recap where it all went wrong – you lived it. But wouldn’t it be nice to have meaningful baseball to look forward to each fall? It’s apparently too much to ask. It would be great to have the same passion for the Rockies as @dadboner does for the Tigers but the Monfarts, Dan O'Dowd and their in house buzz kill, Jay Alves, have soured us all on a franchise that just two years ago had so much promise.
Politicians like to tell you “You deserve better!” This is nothing more than coddling Americans who need to hear something positive when deep down they know they’re screwed. But Denver sports fans are used to their teams making the playoffs and do deserve better than a team that hasn’t even won its division in 20 years of existence. If we can’t celebrate the success of our own local baseball team, we might as well revel in the reflected glory of a fictional boor from Michigan. And that’s just about as sad as it gets.