The Colorado Rockies organization may not be able to run their baseball team but they are doing the best to control the message.
If the Denver Post says mean stuff. Guess what? The USA Today is getting the next interview with Dan O'Dowd. Dick Monfort will answer questions on TV - but only softballs from his puppet network, Root Sports (who won't even post the video online).
And...if you wear a bag on your head like fans of horrible teams have since the dawn of time ... they will throw your ass out of Coors Field. Accounts of this have been swirling around the web for weeks now.
Paying customers wishing to express their discontentment may boo and boo only.
But why is booing OK when paper bar wearing is not?
Because everybody is doing it.
I want to stamp a South Stands logo on 40,000 paper bags and go hand them out at the entrances to the park. Then everybody can wear bags on their heads. Let's see security remove the whole damn crowd.
The Monforts have already proven that you can't keep people away from Coors Field.
Realistically, it will never happen. Nobody could get all of the Rockies faithful to don a "Detroit Lions mask". But we should all do it. All of us bitter, angry Rockies fans, that is.
Better yet our kids should.
And our grandmothers.
Let's see who Coors Field security is willing to drag out for wearing bags.
If you happen to know a priest, ask him to wear a bag. A soldier. An heroic fireman.
These kickings-out must be recorded on video and documented online (here at the South Stands would do fine).
In fact, we will offer a $20 gift certificate to 5280 Shirt Shop and a $20 bar tab at either Pour Kids location, the Handlebar Tavern or Boone's Tavern for the first decent vid we get documenting a fan (preferably a child or a creaky clergyperson) being removed from a game.